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the power of positive thinking

Ever have one of those mornings that sets you up to fail for the rest of the day? Well, that’s exactly what happened to me the morning I recorded this episode.

I woke up at 4:30 a.m. to my 4-year-old son sitting on my head!

And despite my best efforts, we didn’t go back to sleep. 

I felt too tired and rushed to do my typical morning routine. When we finally got out of bed, I was short with my husband—which threw off his mood, too.

Ollie refused to put his clothes on for school.

I spilled my coffee on my new sweater—and my whole schedule was derailed.

By the time I got home from drop-off, I couldn’t shake my frustration. 

At that point, I could do one of two things: 

1. Stay super frustrated and continue to have a crappy day.

2. Practice my 4-step method for redesigning my day and TOTALLY turn it all around.

I chose to use my 4-step practice, and it worked like a charm! I was able to shift my energy and my mood and show up for you on today’s show with a super high vibe. 

On this episode of Dear Gabby, I’m going to share my 4-step method to change your mood fast. It’s a subtle practice, but it can create radical change in your life. You’ll learn how to lean into solutions rather than problems, and how to change your narrative from conflict and loss to growth and possibility.

the Universe is always responding to your energy

Practice this method for the next 40 days and expect MAJOR life shifts. 

listen now
in this episode, you’ll discover: 
  • How the Daily Design method transformed my life
  • 4 questions to ask every morning to put yourself in a positive mindset and set the tone for the entire day
  • How to reset and realign yourself at any point in your day, wherever you are 
  • How to create radical change and manifest the life you want, one day at a time 

You can use this approach from the get-go every day, but you can also come back to it when you need to get back on track. 

why do you need this tool?

I can honestly say the secrets to my success have all been centered around creating a positive mindset. It’s endlessly iterative and incredibly powerful.

And it all comes down to setting yourself up to win every day by deciding how you want your day to go. Yup, it’s all in your hands. 

reclaim your super attractor powers

Have you ever had a day that felt like it was just spiraling out of your control? Like it wasn’t possible to feel aligned with yourself and the Universe? 

Or, have you ever told yourself, “Maybe tomorrow will be better.” 

I’m telling you that you don’t have to wait. You can take back the reins today, right now.

You are already in the driver’s seat.

gabby

My Daily Design method and the 4 questions I’m revealing on Dear Gabby will put you back in control and back in Super Attractor mode. 

It’s never too late to course-correct. When you reprogram what you believe, you can start to experience a totally different perspective and a totally different life. Living a fun life isn’t about how perfect our attitude is. It’s about how quickly we return to high vibes. 

Ready to turn this day around? Start right here.

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disclaimer

This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and support you on your personal journey towards inner peace. I am not a psychologist or a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from any psychological or medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

dear gabby #127 Mar 27, 2023 emotional wellbeing 28 min

4 ways to change your mood fast

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The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

Hi there, Gabby here. This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and support you on your personal journey towards inner peace. I’m not a psychologist or a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from a psychological or medical condition, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

Many, many years ago, I sent a copy of my book, Add More ~ing to Your Life—my first book, so this had to be like 13 years ago. I sent it to my mentor and friend, Dr. Wayne Dyer, and I got a response within a week from him receiving it. I was so moved that this world-renowned author was writing back to me, and so I made a commitment that day to do the same. That when people reached out to me or if I met people on the street, that I would send them books and I was gonna send them a book in the mail.

And that is where I have been so lucky to have the resource Stamps.com. This is a resource that my team has been using so much, particularly this year. We have so many books that we wanna send. And stamps.com lets you print your own postage and print labels right from your own home. And it’s quick and it’s easy.

And actually, stamps.com is so easy that all you need is a computer and a printer, and you can literally print out your postage from wherever you are and wherever you do your business. And they make it really easy to get set up. So you go to stamps.com and they’re gonna send you everything you need to get started—even a free scale.

And it’s also super easy to schedule a package to be picked up through stamps.com dashboard. And did I mention stamps.com saves you money? That’s right. stamps.com literally has postage rates that you can’t find anywhere else. Set your business up for success when you get started with stamps.com today. Sign up with promo code Gabby for a special offer that includes a four-week trial, plus free postage and a free digital scale.

No long-term commitments or contracts. Just go to stamps.com, click the microphone at the top of the page and enter code Gabby.

Hey there. Welcome to Dear Gabby. I’m your host, Gabby Bernstein, and if you landed here, it is absolutely no accident. It means that you’re ready to feel good and manifest a life beyond your wildest dreams. Let’s get started.

Welcome back to Dear Gabby. Welcome back. Today we are gonna talk about how to get into a positive mindset. Yes, this is the theme of my life—leaning into solutions rather than problems. Setting myself up to see the world through the lens of a more positive perspective. And I genuinely can say to you that the secret to my life, happiness, joy, success is my commitment to a positive mindset.

And it’s something that I take so seriously that I actually designed an entire method around it. It’s inside Super Attractor and I’m gonna teach it to you today. It is my Daily Design Method, and this is a practice of setting yourself up for the day from the moment that you wake up.

Because typically what happens is, is we’ll wake up in the morning and we’ll turn to our phone, or we will look over to our partner and be frustrated about something, or we’ll carry our dramas from the day before into this next day. Or, we’ll, in my case, be like this morning, be woken up at 4:30 in the morning by a four-year-old and be up the rest of the day.

So we have these moments in life that the day doesn’t start the way that we would want it to. And I love to set the intention at the beginning of the day for how do I wanna feel that day? Who do I wanna be that day? What do I wanna receive and what do I wanna give? And this is what I call the Daily Design Method.

Starting each day in your mind or in a journal, whatever you feel is the most amplifying for you or the simple for you, given your circumstances. Like if you have a four-year-old sitting on your head. Asking yourself, how do I wanna feel today? Who do I want to be today? What do I want to receive today? And what do I wanna give today?

So I’m gonna bring this into today’s episode, and I wanna just emphasize the power of setting yourself up to win mentally when you wake up in the morning. When we start off on the wrong foot, like I did today, a lot of things can start to feel like they’re unfolding. And I’ll just give you an example.

My kid woke me up at 4:30. I wasn’t feeling a hundred percent. We didn’t get back to sleep. I then didn’t do my design method. I get in the car to drive to the city to do this episode with you. I see my husband at my apartment and I’m kind of short with him, and we just get into these cycles and I’ve had to actually do a five minute meditation before I did my makeup to really reset my day.

Had I potentially done my daily design method, all the things that happened, waking up early, the kid being sick, me feeling unwell, would’ve actually been dissolved much more smoothly earlier on to set me up for a lot more success as I carried on with my day.

But don’t worry, you can always reset in any given moment. You can reconnect and you can do your Daily Design Method at three o’clock in the afternoon. You don’t have to beat yourself up if you don’t get it in first thing in the morning. Although I do highly recommend that you make those mornings a serious commitment and that you care for your mindset and you care for your thoughts, and you set intentions for how you wanna be each day.

If you get into a habit of this, doing it day over day, you’re gonna see major changes in your life. So as you can see, this is a simple method. It’s a subtle practice, but it can create radical change in your life. And I can’t wait to see how it performs for you. Let’s bring our first guest in today and see how we can really take it seriously, bring it into your life.

And I want you to really reflect on how different things can be as a result of practicing these methods.

GABBY: Let’s bring in our first guest, Sam. Hi Katie.

KATIE: Hi Gabby. I’m so excited to be here.

GABBY: How are you doing?

KATIE: Yeah, I’m doing good. I’m really excited for this topic because I think I’m ready for some additional habits to turn my life around.

GABBY: What’s been happening that you need to turn your life around?

KATIE: I had a difficult year last year. Some changes with employment, some changes with relationship, and I’m ready to start fresh in 2023. I started developing some great habits, like I listened to a meditation of yours every morning before I wake up, but it sounds like this method would jumpstart my day even more.

GABBY: So yeah, you’re an easy Dear Gabby, Katie, because you’re already doing it, but I would just add this to it.

So do your meditation and then have a notebook next to you when you come out of your meditation, pick up your notebook and answer those four questions. How do I want to feel today? Who do I want to be today? What do I want to receive today? And what do I want to give today?

And just see what comes through. But if you do that meditation first, you’re actually priming yourself to really sink into that core desire for the day and set yourself up for what it is that you wanna call in.

And I’m really happy for you because sometimes when things change and things fall apart—a job or relationship. That’s just a detour in the right direction. That’s the universe revealing to you what’s next. When we have these things change in our life, when we lose something, when we see a shift in our life with a relationship or a job or anything, it’s really an opportunity to choose to see it through the lens of love. To choose to see it as an opportunity rather than a problem.

And that lens of the world, that optimism, that hope, that solution seeking, has the power to change who you are. And it can give you momentum and give you power and set you up to win rather than keep you stuck in regret or suffering or sadness. And all those feelings of sadness and regret and suffering must be felt, must be worked through, but they can’t be the way that we show up day in and day out because we can’t move forward with that grace, and we can’t give ourselves the opportunity to design not only a new day, but a new life.

I just wanna really acknowledge you for how proud I am of you for making that commitment to yourself. And I hope you feel that from me right now.

KATIE: Thank you so much. And what do you suggest if something comes up? Cuz I can start the day well, feeling balanced after meditation and now adding in this practice.

But what happens come midday, three o’clock?

GABBY: Do it again. Do it again. Do it again. Check back in. Go sit in the bathroom at your office, wherever you are, and breathe and ask yourself again, how do I wanna feel today? Who do I wanna be today? What do I wanna receive today? And what do I wanna give today?

And just keep coming back to it because it might change in the afternoon.

KATIE: Mm-hmm.

GABBY: But give yourself permission to go there. Give yourself permission to confirm and affirm how you want to feel and who you wanna be. You can redirect at anytime. So keep coming back to it.

KATIE: Amazing.

GABBY: Nice one, Katie.

KATIE: Thank you so much, Gabby.

[AD BREAK]

This show is sponsored by Better Help. This sponsor is so valuable for you guys. It’s no secret that throughout the show I’m constantly promoting my experience in therapy. In fact, I literally just hung up the phone with my therapist, never miss it, and my therapist and I have been working together for over a decade and our bond and our connection is one of the most valuable relationships in my entire life.

And therapy is all about deepening that self-awareness and understanding. But most importantly, I believe it’s about trusting someone. Trusting someone can help you, and that’s why I am so proud to have Better Help as a sponsor here on the show.

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Here’s something super cool. I, for my entire life have had a lot of consciousness around gut microbiome and holistic health. And now, finally the world’s caught up. We are in gut mania right now. Everywhere I look, I see something about gut health and microbiome, and I’m not joking you when I tell you that. I hear people talking about probiotics everywhere.

So, you know, it’s a hot topic right now. But the problem is, is that all this information can be really confusing or even unintentionally misleading. I have had to deal with a lot of gut issues throughout my life, and when I find a product that supports my gut health, I have to share about it from the rooftops.

So let me help you cut through the noise and the hashtags and the headlines. My suggestion is Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. It is scientifically validated and clinically studied, and it is the next generation probiotics. This is a probiotic only that I recommend, but I trust, and it’s really easy. All you have to do is take two capsules once a day on an empty stomach. And this could be the first thing you do in the morning right when you wake up 30 minutes before your first meal.

And that’s it. The DS-01 Daily Synbiotic to you monthly in a sustainable packaging with a reusable glass jar that protects probiotics inside and helps minimize plastic use and waste. I love the little jar. Avoid the gut mania and head to the trusted source of Synbiotics. Visit seed.com/deargabby and use code Dear Gabby, to redeem 20% off your first month of Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic.

That’s seed.com/deargabby, and use code Dear Gabby,

[END AD BREAK]

GABBY: Sam, who’s next?

ALLISON: Hi Gabby.

GABBY: Hi Allison. How are you, sweetheart?

ALLISON: I am so good because I actually got on here when you first started Dear Gabby. And my phone died, and then I didn’t get to get on and I was like, today’s the day.

GABBY: Today’s your day baby. How you doing?

ALLISON: So, um, much like the last woman. I have been on a journey, I feel like, since Covid started, so I got more grounded with myself. I actually just celebrated one year without alcohol.

GABBY: Congratulations.

ALLISON: Yes, it’s, it was really a big, pivotal move, and I have to say that you and Melissa Wood Health have been really big on how it makes you feel to make me hit that year.

GABBY: I’m so happy to hear that. That’s so beautiful.

ALLISON: Yeah, and since I started this journey during Covid of getting more grounded in myself and spiritual, I’ve started taking classes.

I take a meditation class, and then there’s a little lesson that goes along with it. But I’ve lost a lot of friends and I had two really great romantic relationships with two really great guys, but they just didn’t understand certain things that I was going through and like growing and that it was really heartbreaking.

So I totally can relate to the method that you’re talking about, but it’s hard when you’re suffering such loss knowing that spirit is removing things to grow higher. But I have a hard time like, okay, I’m staying grounded. I’m staying grounded, but…

GABBY: I’m gonna give you a new perspective. Okay? I’m gonna just jump in and give you a new perspective.

So when we decide to design our lives differently, and when we make the commitment to see ourselves differently and to create change and to release old habits, it sometimes can start off like a little bit of a shit show. As we start to make these changes in our life, the old patterns shake off and so do some people.

So do some jobs. So do some ways of being. We’re not only shedding the habit, but we’re also shedding the way we were. And as we start to release these behaviors, we also release the pretenses of who we thought we were. We release the people who were at one time maybe resonant with the old behavior and no longer resonant with who we are now.

And we start to release a lot of different experiences that once may have been a fit or a match that now no longer work for us. And so, while it’s heartbreaking to let go or heartbreaking to see someone not willing or able to go on that journey with you, it’s also a sign of your commitment to your recovery.

It’s a sign of your commitment to your change. Because if the people who once fed that hole within you or fed that weakness within you are now starting to fall off, it means that you’re filling that hole and that weakness within yourself. And so, I wanna really acknowledge that when I first got clean and sober and I made that major change in my own life, all my friends changed.

I actually have one friend that I visited last week in London, and I was just holding her hand and I looked at her and I said, you were the last one standing. She’s the only friend that I kept from that time, the only friend that I kept from that time.

Because when we go through such a chrysalis of becoming new, we often are no longer a match for what was the jobs, the relationships, the people, the behaviors, the patterns, even the way we lived, the food, whatever it is, it can change as we change. And so it’s a bit of a mourning period, but it’s also a really beautiful sign that you’re actually so committed to your change, and I’m proud of you.

So keep designing what you want.

ALLISON: Yeah, and I feel like I do journal and I have a vision board and I really am trying to see that life that I can grab that’s beyond the my wildest dreams. Like I sometimes go to your quotes, to get that like little lift because like you said, it’s the mourning period I feel like I’m in and it’s just sad.

GABBY: If you chose to see this mourning period as growth rather than despair, that’s a better vibration.

ALLISON: Yeah.

GABBY: To see it in the way of saying, oh, okay, well this is painful, but I’m growing. That’s a way better experience of what you’re experiencing. You got me?

ALLISON: Changing the narrative of it.

GABBY: Absolutely, my love. That’s what this entire episode is about; that’s what I’m talking about.

ALLISON: No, and that’s really helpful because I have been having that hard time shifting that, so this was wonderful.

GABBY: Yeah, growth is good and it’s not always fun.

ALLISON: No, but it’s good on the other side, and that’s what I’m hopeful for.

GABBY: Always, always, always. Congratulations, you’re doing a great job.

ALLISON: Thanks Gabby.

[AD BREAK]

Okay, so the other day I was driving down to the city and it was just one of those days, just one of those days that we all have. You know, I’m running a bit behind schedule and I’m kind of hungry. I’m realizing like, I’m not gonna have time to stop and get anything to eat. And so, I remembered in my handbag I had a Perfect Bar.

You know it. You know it. I talk about this product all the time. Perfect Bars are the absolute perfect choice because I can count on them to give me the boost of protein that I need, and I’m not kidding. They are delicious. So having this little protein bar in my bag in that moment was like a dream come true because I could get satiated.

I could feel like I was taking care of myself. I could enjoy this snack. Perfect. Bars are delicious. Anyone that’s purchased one knows that they have the most tasty flavor, the most beautiful texture. They’re like cookie dough, not like a chalky bar. And they don’t have any weird aftertaste or weird flavors. And Perfect Bars are made with freshly ground nut butter, organic honey, and 20 organic super foods plus 17 grams of whole food protein.

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Pretty cool, right? All you have to do is go to perfectsnacks.com/gabby to get a free Perfect Bar today. That’s perfectsnacks.com/gabby to get a free Perfect Bar today. Happy snacking.

[END AD BREAK]

GABBY: All right, let’s bring in one more guest, Sam. Hi sweetheart. How are you?

CALLER: Good. Hi. Oh my God.

GABBY: You’re so cute.

CALLER: Sorry, I wasn’t expecting this. Uh, I really appreciate this topic very much. Feels like a higher power moment right now. Because I’ve been really feeling, um, just needing that restart of the day, starting to go into the depth of despair of just being single and being older and really wanting partnership and that soul connection with someone as a lifelong partner.

And I’ve been single for over 10 years and I’m in my forties now, and it’s, it’s hard to not really start spiraling that it’s my age that is limiting me. And yesterday, I had a really weird experience, which felt like an intense test where I was sitting at a coffee shop and a guy was like walking towards me.

And I had my hair down and I turned to look at him and he mentioned out loud, I think he wasn’t thinking. He said, oh, seriously old. And then, but he didn’t mean for me to hear him, so it just really hurt and was just kind of confirming all of the fears that I have. So, just sitting with that today, really trying to stay in hope, but over a decade of being single.

GABBY: I am so glad you got on, babe. I’m gonna turn this around for you. I’m gonna turn this shit around for you right now, my love. The universe is always gonna reveal back to us what we believe. What we believe is just thoughts that we keep collecting. Beliefs are those thoughts that we collect and collect and collect and collect.

And so, you’ve been collecting a belief system for quite some time that I’m too old. It’s been 10 years…

That belief system is now so strong that it’s being spoken to you. And so let’s thank this lovely man who spoke that to you for being your bottom because I don’t like this for you anymore. I’m done with this for you.

I’m done with this for you. Okay? It’s over. I am going to really suggest strongly that you make a radical commitment to changing your mind. I’m gonna promise you that if you do and you go all in and you do the work inside my book, Happy Days. You then go and read The Universe has Your Back, and then you go and you do Super Attractor or any other book that, whether it’s mine or somebody else’s. Whatever you’re drawn to, therapy, books. Whatever it is that you can get yourself to, to start to reprogram your mind because your thoughts, my love, are creating this reality for you.

And there’s many instances where people could challenge that. Right here, right now, I’m not gonna let you. I’m not gonna let you challenge that. Your thoughts and your beliefs about yourself are creating your reality. And the beauty in that is that you have the power to change it. The beauty in that is that you are not the victim of the world you see.

You have the power within you to reprogram what you believe and when you reprogram what you believe, you can start to receive a totally different perspective and a totally different life. And so, the fact that today’s episode is all about retraining our thoughts and positive thinking and setting ourselves up to win each day, yes, it is about setting intentions.

It is about designing your day. It is about affirming how you wanna feel, but it’s also about doing the deeper work. And I’m gonna send you a copy of Happy Days if you, do you have a copy of my book, Happy Days?

CALLER: No, I don’t.

GABBY: Okay. Girlfriend, sending it to you. Because the beliefs that are, there are old and they’re young and…

When I say old, don’t listen to your little voice. They’re old in the sense that they’ve been around for a long time. And the funny thing too to me is you came on and you said, oh, I’m old and I’m looking at you. And I’m like, she looks like a little girl. Like to me, you look like this cute little girl with your braid and your hat and your plaid.

Like, you look like a little Taylor Swift to me right now. And so like, it’s just, it’s just like our perceptions of ourselves are so, they’re so wrong. And the other thing I wanna mention is, you know, my mother met her husband on match.com in her fifties. So, why couldn’t you in your forties? Why not?

The reason it was easy for my mom was because she believed. She believed she was ready to meet somebody and she believed she could. And she’s been with him now for like 20 years. So, there you go.

CALLER: Thank you so much.

GABBY: You’re welcome, my love. Thank you for coming on. I’m so glad we snuck you in. That was great.

CALLER: Really appreciate it. Thank you so much.

GABBY: I appreciate you too. Go do the work. So let’s close this out. I can’t emphasize enough the power of positive thinking. Obviously, I’ve written nine books. I’m writing my 10th book on this topic right now. But it’s the choice that we make each day. How do we wanna show up?

How do we wanna live? How do we wanna parent? How do we wanna relate? How do we wanna perceive ourselves? And the thoughts that we have—some are easy to change, some are just a choice. And some have a deeper wound that needs to be undone. But even the choice to heal that wound is a better perspective than being stuck in the story of being the victim.

Even the choice to see the discomfort as an empowering opportunity to grow is a shift in your perception. From a metaphysical perspective and from the text A Course in Miracles, the miracle is the shift in your perception. So when you start to see your circumstances through the lens of possibility rather than pain, through the lens of faith, rather than fear through the lens of what could be rather than what was, solution rather than problem, everything can change.

Everything can change. You’re listening to me, but my hands are in the air. Literally right now. My hands are in the air and I’m saying everything can change. So please, please, I’m asking you if you are a regular listener of the show, if you’re still listening here all the way at the end of this episode, start the Daily Design Method right here, right now.

Start today once you stop listening to this. Ask yourself those four questions. How do I wanna feel today? Who do I want to be today? What do I want to receive today? And what do I wanna give today? Practice this method and thank me later. Thanks so much for being with me here today on Dear Gabby. I’ll see you next week.

If you made it to the end of this episode, that means you’re truly committed to miracles. I’m really proud of you. If you wanna get more Gabby, tune in every Monday for a new episode. Make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss any of the guidance or special bonus episodes.

Your experience at this show means a lot to me, so I really wanna welcome you to leave an honest review and you can follow me on social media at @GabbyBernstein.

And if you wanna get in on the action, sign up for a chance to be Dear Gabby’d live deargabby.com. See you next week.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.