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This episode of Dear Gabby is deeply important to me. It’s about how to overcome addiction.

I recently celebrated 18 years of sobriety. My sober date, October 2, 2005, was the turning point in my life. It was the catalyst for great change. When I decided to get sober, I chose life. I chose purpose, freedom and inner peace. 

And I made a massive choice to be of service. 

addiction, recovery, and spirituality

I recorded this show to give people hope that my story of recovery can be theirs. I want anyone who’s struggling with addiction to know that they are not alone. There is a way out. And there is hope, starting with the heartfelt guidance I share in Dear Gabby. 

Think of this show as a message of hope from me to you, delivered with all my love. 

I want to be very clear: This message isn’t just for anyone who is struggling with drugs and alcohol. Addictions are rampant in our world today. If you’re addicted to sugar, social media, love, sex, work, worry or anything else that distracts you from being present with your feelings, this is for you. 

In this show, I share how to overcome addiction using a gentle, two-step method. I have found that addiction, recovery and spirituality go hand-in-hand, and this practice incorporates all three to provide great relief.

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how to overcome addiction using spiritual tools

Here are the steps you can take to replace an addictive habit with a spiritual practice. I’ve found this two-pronged method particularly helpful. 

Step 1

practice abstinence

First, take away the permission-giving thoughts that are fueling your addiction. When I quit drinking, I didn’t give myself permission to have one or two glasses of wine a week. I knew I couldn’t drink casually. This abstinence helped me tremendously in my recovery. 

Step 2

lean into a spiritual practice

When you no longer have permission to reach for your drug of choice, you’ll need to put a habit in place to replace drinking, texting, or whatever it is you’re addicted to. When you feel the urge to turn to your vice, choose a spiritual practice instead. You may want to meditate, journal about all your frustration and fear (I call this practice Rage on the Page, and I explain it on Dear Gabby today), or take a walk. This will help you redirect your neural pathways and get to the root cause of the addiction.

honor all your parts

As you work to overcome addictive patterns, it might bring you relief to know that your addictions aren’t bad. Your addictive parts have been working hard to keep you from tapping into feelings that you aren’t ready to touch. 

In Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, these parts are called the “firefighters.” They are protector parts, and I describe them in my latest book, Happy Days. On page 148, I write: 

Our addictive behavior doesn’t make us horrible people; instead, addictive protector parts can be seen as doing their best to keep us safe. Getting high on an intensely emotional relationship; numbing out with sex, drugs, food, or alcohol; or using work to avoid feelings are among some of the tactics for anesthetizing the exiled parts. Becoming abstinent from addictive patterns is only one step toward recovery. The true resolution begins with accepting that protectors were doing the best they could. Healing for these parts and their addictions comes through devotional therapeutic support, possibly 12-step recovery, and IFS therapy to gently address the exiles and the extreme protector roles. 

I recognize as a recovering addict that living in an addictive state was destructive to me and to others, but today I can forgive myself for the past by acknowledging the important role my addiction played in keeping me safe when I had no other resources to rely on. When addiction can be respected as a form of protection, we can forgive ourselves for the past—and that will clear space for healing in the present.

— Happy Days, Chapter 7, Page 148

allow yourself to feel gratitude

As hard as it may seem, I welcome you to feel some gratitude for the parts of you that have been keeping you stuck in addiction. These parts served an important role—but it’s time for them to step aside. 

You may even want to say this prayer as you thank your addictive parts and tell them that you are safe without them: 

Thank you, addiction, for teaching me what I still need to heal. I am now ready to begin the process of facing my fears, and I have the spiritual tools I need to carry me through. With great tenderness and respect, I invite you to step aside so that I can continue my healing journey. Thank you for the work you’ve done. The Universe has my back from here.

my message to you

The reason we’re addicted to anything is that we’re running from feelings. But feel me making this promise to you right now: 

You don’t have to run. You can befriend those feelings. You can care for those feelings. You can show up for those feelings. And when you show up for them, there’s nothing left to run from.

Thank you for listening to this deeply personal episode of Dear Gabby. I hope it serves you.

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disclaimer

This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and support you on your personal journey towards inner peace. I am not a psychologist or a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from any psychological or medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

dear gabby #89 Oct 03, 2022 physical wellbeing 41 min

addiction and how to overcome it

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The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

Hi there, Gabby here. This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and support you on your personal journey towards inner peace. I'm not a psychologist or a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from a psychological or medical condition, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

Listen up, my friends. My 14-day Relationship Challenge is only three days in. It’s not too late for you to get in. We’re actually closing the doors completely on October 5th. We have challengers going through this 14-day experience with me that are already seeing results.

I’m already getting messages and DMs from people saying, “This has already changed my life!” So you can totally catch up. Just go to deargabby.com/relationship. You can get in now. It closes on the 5th. We are only opening this once a year so, don’t miss it.

And if this conversation that we’re having today on the show is really supporting you, then my hope is that it takes you to the next level and you start to heal the relationship that you have to yourself and others at deargabby.com/relationship. Join us now.

Hey there. Welcome to Dear Gabby. I'm your host Gabby Bernstein, and if you landed here, it is absolutely no accident. It means that you're ready to feel good and manifest a life beyond your wildest dreams. Let's get started.

Welcome back to Dear Gabby, my friends. Welcome back. Today is a really important show for me. I often say things like, Oh, this is a great show. This is a big show. This show is actually probably one of the most important shows I'll ever give. It's a show that I hope to be continuing to share year after year around this timeframe.

It is my celebration show of my 17 years of sobriety. My sober date, October 2nd, 2005, was the turning point in my life. It was the catalyst for my change. It was the decision to choose life, to choose purpose, to choose freedom and inner peace.

Had I not made that choice, I honestly don't know if I'd be alive right now. And the choice to get sober, the choice to get clean was also a choice to get honest. It was a choice to get brave and courageous. It was a choice to be in the service of others. Whether you realize it or not, when you make a commitment to being sober, you actually are making a commitment to the world.

I often meet people when I'm out in the world giving talks and they'll say, Oh, my dad's sober. I never saw him use, or my mom's sober, and they've been sober my whole life, or they got sober when I was born. And I always just am in awe of how lucky these individuals are to have sober parents, to have people that were showing up for them with that level of truth and authenticity and a presence of spiritual connection.

And I guess my hope for this episode today is to just give anyone out there who's contemplating sobriety, struggling with sobriety. Maybe they went out during Covid and trying to get back into sobriety or looking for answers and looking not just from sober from drugs and alcohol, but sober from all mood altering substances, sober from addictive patterns, love, sex, porn, food, whatever your addiction may be. And I believe that we all have them in our own forms.

To listen to this show. My hope is that you listen to this show and that you feel a sense of relief in knowing that you're not alone and you feel inspired to know that my story is your story. That you feel inspired to know that there is a way out, that there is a way out.

And when you open up your conscious awareness to the possibilities of recovery and sobriety and whatever form sobriety comes for you, because I believe being abstinent from certain foods is a form of sobriety, or being abstinent from gambling is a form of sobriety, or being abstinent from gaming is a form of sobriety.

So I wanna acknowledge that whatever sober path shows up for you and is relatable to you, that this show could be a massive opportunity for you to throw your hands in the air and say, “Okay, I'm willing to know more. I'm willing to become curious about the part of myself that needs this addiction to feel safe. I'm willing to be curious about all that it took to get me to this place and to be compassionate towards that part of me that's been running for so long.”

And there's a beautiful prayer that has been a major guide for me throughout my sobriety, and that's the Serenity Prayer. And anyone who's had the privilege of entering into a 12-step room knows the Serenity Prayer by heart. And it's something we say at the end of every meeting. And the Serenity Prayer is, God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

I believe that the pillars of sobriety lie in that exact prayer—serenity, acceptance, courage, and wisdom. Serenity, God grant me the serenity, the peace within the blessing within myself to recognize that there could be a better way. The acceptance of myself and every part of who I am and all that has happened in my life that made me go in this direction.

The acceptance of my behavior, the acceptance of my experience is the acceptance of my addiction. The courage to change, The courage to show up for life in a different way. The courage to release this protector mechanism that's been keeping me seemingly safe for so long, and the wisdom to show up for the guidance that I receive and the wisdom to know the difference between what is my intuition, what is my courage, and what is my fear?

I acknowledge my sobriety as the reason for the miraculous life that I live today. If it weren't for my desire to get clean and sober and my commitment to staying sober since October 2nd, 2005, I would not be the mother that I am. I would not be the wife that I am. I would not be the friend that I am. I would not be the author, the speaker, and the teacher that I am. I would not be the presence that I am in the world. I also have such a high level of expectation for showing up with the best presence that I can, and I have the wisdom to know the difference. I have the wisdom to know the difference.

And I witness certain behaviors in life—even if it's not picking up a drink or using a drug. I can witness them as not sober behaviors and I can forgive myself. Choose again, and take care of my side of the street, apologize, and do something new.

So I know right now that addiction is actually taking people down more than it ever has before. Because the addictions have become so extreme and so life-threatening and so blown out because of the given circumstances of the world. Because the access to drugs and alcohol, but particularly the drugs that people are choosing these days because of the collective trauma that we have that's so unresolved because of the fears and the chaos and the uncertainty and the pandemic and everything that has shaken us to our core, addiction is on the rise.

Addiction is taking more lives in the United States than a car accident. So I really wanna emphasize the importance and the power of this conversation. I know that whatever guests come through today will have the bravery, the courage, the acceptance, and the willingness to open up to their own experience of addiction so that I can be of service to them today.

I hope that you recognize yourself in their stories, and I hope that you recognize yourself in me. I hope that you have even the slightest willingness. In 12-step, they say a mustard seed of hope. Even a mustard seed of hope is enough to begin the journey of what sober recovery could look like.

This show might crack you open, but we'll leave in the show notes a lot of different resources for where you can find support, and it is my mission in this lifetime to help people release the bondage of addiction so that they can be free in their inner system and free in the world.

Addiction is just another protection mechanism that's gone to a very extreme role. In IFS, the addictive patterns in internal family systems, the addictive patterns are actually known as firefighters.

So when our other coping mechanisms, our other protection mechanisms like controlling or maybe fighting back or overdoing things, all those protection mechanisms that when they stop working, we run to the fridge, we run to the drugs, we run to the boyfriend, we run to the porn, we run to the gambling, whatever it might be to put the fire out. And my prayer is that this show helps you witness the ways and the moments when you feel that need to rush to the fire and put it out.

[AD BREAK]

And the more we become curious about the addiction and the addictive part of who we are, and the more we become compassionate toward that part of who we are, and the more we connect to that part of who we are. The more acceptance we have for our addiction, the more patience we have to heal, the more wisdom and courage can come forward.

So my hope is that today's work that we do together will help you begin to befriend the parts of you that are so addicted and not see that addiction as a horrible trait or a behavior that makes you bad, but instead to perceive it as a part of you that has become so extreme in the pursuit of trying to protect you from impermissible feelings.

I believe that all addiction stems from trauma. It's the protection mechanism numbing the pain, and the suffering of the trauma. It's obviously a big topic that comes up all throughout Happy Days, my latest book, The guided path from trauma to profound freedom and inner peace.

The book opens with me telling my story of being an addict, having two choices, the choice to stay on that path of addiction and really suffer, or the choice to get clean and make a major impact on the world.

Obviously, we know which choice I made, and today's episode is an opportunity for you to hear the stories of others and hear my story and have a moment to reflect and say, “Am I gonna choose to stay on the path that I'm on and be in a very destructive way? Or could this be the day that I choose to get clean off of whatever my addiction may be and make a major impact in my own life and in the world?”

And there might be parts of you that are like, get me off this now, Gabby. I don't wanna hear it. If that's the case, stop listening and listen when you're ready. If that's the case, I actually think that you have the choice to stop listening or you could have the courage to continue.

There's no right or wrong way. The goal is to get to a place where you're willing. All that's required is your willingness. So if you're willing to keep going, to keep listening, to keep engaging in this conversation with me today, and to celebrate 17 years of my recovery with me by talking about what the power of living sober in your own sobriety, whatever that might be, what the power of living sober means.

Then I welcome you to carry on, to listen to the show, to open your heart to the guests that join us and to stay willing. Just wake up every day and say that prayer, I'm willing to heal. That's all you need. Thank you for being part of this conversation with me right now, and I'm so proud to be able to share all this with you.

GABBY: Let's bring in our first guest. Hi, sweetheart. How are you?

CALLER: Can you hear me okay?

GABBY: I can.

CALLER: Awesome. So I wanted to talk to you about the different forms of addiction. I'm so glad you mentioned that it's not just about drugs or alcohol. cause I am 150% addicted to sugar for sure.

And I have done detoxes. I've gone six months; I've gone 90 days. But I always go back to it and I know there's something deeper with that and I am really trying to figure that out.

GABBY: Okay. Would you be willing to just talk a little bit and become curious about it with me?

CALLER: Absolutely. Yeah, of course.

GABBY: Cool. Okay. So when you think about the moments when you are like, I need that sugar, I gotta go get it, what's happening in your body in those moments?

CALLER: It feels outta control.

GABBY: Out of control, be beautiful work. Okay. Is there any other sensations that you could visualize or like a color or a shape or an age even or a gender to that part of you?

CALLER: I mean, I know growing up that my household was very unstable and so, I would just find whatever was in the closet, whether it was cookies or candy or whatever, and I would just hide and eat like the whole thing.

GABBY: Yeah.

CALLER: And so, I think whenever I start to feel a sense that I'm not in control, maybe I feel like choosing something to eat or having the choice to do that or have something support me is like a way to stay in control.

GABBY: Beautiful. And I just am feeling such a deep level of compassion for that experience from you as a child. And I first wanna thank that, that part of you for all the awareness that it has, that younger part of you for just knowing, okay, you know? Yeah. Things were really unstable in my home and I needed this to protect me.

CALLER: Yeah.

GABBY: So if you were table to look at the sugar addiction, is that, what… can we call it that?

CALLER: Oh, for sure. Yeah. absolutely.

GABBY: And it's also really cool that you brought this up because sugar is just as bad as cocaine. If not worse, because it's socially acceptable. Right? Sometimes the food stuff is actually hardest because it's socially acceptable or the work addiction is the hardest cause that's really socially acceptable, especially in the US right?

So I wanna really acknowledge you and just say thank you to the, to the bravery and the courage to speak up and the wisdom, right? So you've already got courage, bravery, and that wisdom. It's gorgeous.

CALLER: Thank you.

GABBY: As we start to see that sugar addiction as a way of protecting this younger part of you, how do you feel towards it? How do you feel towards the addiction now?

CALLER: I don't know if I feel something towards the addiction, but I feel compassion towards the child that she needed to find a way to feel better.

GABBY: There you go.

CALLER: And that was the only thing she could access at the time. But now I'm sort of having an aha moment that I have more, more tools to access than just sugar.

Like now I have therapy. Now I have, you to talk to. Now I have podcasts, instead of reaching for a bag of cookies, I could reach for something else instead. That will make me feel better than that does.

GABBY: First of all, you're such a rock star, Sarah. Nice job.

I actually just wanna acknowledge all the therapy and all the work that you have done, whether it's with Dear Gabby, therapy, podcast, because it's given you a direct connection to that younger girl, and you're also speaking to her.

I'm, I'm just referencing it as a younger girl, I don't wanna put words in your mouth, but speaking to that, young girl, from a place of compassion and a place of wisdom.

CALLER: Yeah.

GABBY: I love the idea of abstinence for where you are at, because I just wanna make sure that it doesn't feel so boundaried and scary.

CALLER: Okay.

GABBY: Because if you looked at those moments when you're feeling like I need to run to the sugar, and you just checked in with your body in that moment, And you allowed yourself to get curious about what was happening in your body and what you were feeling, what you were thinking, just like you just did before.

I'm feeling out of control and you started to get even more curious and focus even more inside and maybe get in touch with that little girl.

CALLER: Yep.

GABBY: You could be the source of soothing for her that she did not have.

CALLER: Ah, that's cool.

GABBY: And this is IFS Therapy, which is known as Self with a capital S. That part of you that's with me right now, the part of you that has compassion for her, the part of you that has all the courage to come on right here and talk to me. The part of you that is super connected to that young girl, like you're really connected to her. These qualities, these C qualities of self. There's a whole episode on that.

CALLER: I was actually on that episode. We talked about it with my mom. we were talking about coming back to the little girl and doing those qualities of C with my mom. So it's kind of like we're still going back to the little version of me, like we're still…

GABBY: Girl, we are back. We are back. This is no accident. Okay? So if you have any form of addiction, I want everybody to go back and listen to that episode. And that’s episode 76.

So as we start to even just become curious about the addiction and in your case become a little bit curious about what's underneath it, start to feel softer and more connected to and calm with.

And I've always believed that addiction is a habit, right? So the abstinence is a really big first step because you're no longer giving yourself permission because we have permission given thoughts when it comes to addiction.

So when I said to myself on October 2nd, 2005, I am no longer giving myself permission to drink, that was a profound moment in my life because it took away the option. When I no longer had the option to pick up the drink or the drug, it gave me the space to do the deeper work.

So I would recommend, Sarah the abstinence. If you take away those permission given thoughts like, I don't eat sugar anymore, which that is my story. I'm not eating sugar in 15 years.

And when we make that commitment, if I don't do this, I don't do that, then that's a first step. It's a huge first step because It takes away the permission to numb out. That's not for everybody. Some people need some more balance and some more flexibility, but speaking specifically to that strong addict part, I think it's very valuable.

And so I would recommend maybe trying right now for 40 days of, of abstinence, but instead of abstinence, like white knuckling it in the 12 steps, they would say, don't drink—first step, right? Go to meetings, call your sponsor. Do the steps. So in your case, don't go for the sugar first step. So we don't do sugar and go to, Dear Gabby, listen to episode 76, or read that book, or whatever the steps are that you take. So putting a spiritual action in the place of the addictive pattern allows you not only to redirect your neural pathways and change the pattern, but it also allows you to start to heal the root cause of the condition.

And tend to the younger part of you that's asking for help.

CALLER: That's so good because I know I can do the abstinence, but I keep going back, but I've never tried replacing it with something else. I've just not done it.

GABBY: Abstinence without a plan of personal growth and spiritual development is white-knuckling it. It's forceful in nature. Whereas if you're saying, I'm going to refrain, I'm no longer giving myself permission to do this, but instead I am going to replace it with this, or whenever I notice the desire to pick up the sugar, I'm gonna notice what's going on in my body.

I'm gonna ask myself what I know about that, and then I'm gonna feel, what do I need? What do I need right now? Other than the sugar. What do I need? Okay. I need a hug. I need to go for a walk. I need to hear Gabby's voice. I need to read that book. I need to listen to that audio. I need to go call my therapist.

Whatever it is. This is gonna work for you, Sarah.

CALLER: You think so?

GABBY: I know it. I know it. You're teed up and ready to go. You're teed up and ready to go. This was beautiful. I love these full circle moments. It's so cool. Thank you, gorgeous.

GABBY: Thank you.

[AD BREAK]

GABBY: All right, Sam. Bringing the next guest. Hi, sweetness. How you doing?

CALLER: I'm all good. I'm all good. So when talking about addiction, there is no substance addiction that I have, but I'm addicted to social media.

GABBY: It's one of the biggest addictions. Thank you for sharing.

CALLER: So whenever there is, some problem or if there is something where I'm feeling low, social media is what distracts me from it and I get hooked onto it.

And I get a high from social media and then I come back again. But then I think I'm losing my calm in that and the peace that I would have if the, the social media is not so present in my life, so I just need guidance from you.

GABBY: Well, first of all, I want to acknowledge you for your bravery, your courage, your wisdom, and your acceptance. This is what we're talking about today. The courage and the wisdom is right here, Samhita. It's just stunning. Because you know what, my love? You are having the awareness of the addiction that most humans are suffering from without knowing. Social media or device addiction is at all-time high.

As we know, these apps are actually made to be that sticky, to keep you coming back, to keep you hooked, which is, uh, it's quite scary. And the high of the likes and the high of the approval and the high of the, the comparing or the high of the drama, whatever that is, is super addictive.

It's also a way of dissociating. Oh, I'm feeling something. I don't wanna feel that boom right to our phone. But then without even knowing it, it becomes this habitual neural pathway. I gotta go to it. I gotta go to it. I gotta go to it. I gotta go to it. So your awareness and your willingness to heal, this is the first step.

And I just wanna acknowledge that. And it is just as severe an addiction as maybe alcoholism because it's taking you away from presence. It's taking you away from the connection to others. It's taking you away from your ability to show up in the world at your highest capacity. It's taking you away from your creative force. It's taking you away from your spiritual connection.

And so, all addiction is something that we put in the place of a feeling, and it also is put in the place of the higher power. And so, what the antidote to that addictive path is to start to bring in a spiritual connection in place of it. So one thing you could begin to do if you felt called for it, do some abstinence.

Just like I said to the young woman before you and I see your face, like, No f**king way, Gabby. Would you ever delete your apps?

CALLER: Deleting is a little difficult, but I'll try to…

GABBY: Or taking them off your phone for a while?

CALLER: Yeah, sure.

GABBY: Okay. But that's only step one. Removing them to start to create new patterns. And the biggest thing is when we remove the substance, whatever that may be, there's a lot of feelings that we're left with because what is that addiction doing?

It's replacing a deeper-rooted feeling. So even if it's just for one week, I would advise you one week, we can do a week. Everybody can do a week. You're not deleting them, but you're just logging out and taking the app off of your phone, screen, and computer for that week, okay?

You can always log back in. Okay? So remove it for one week and I want you to notice the feelings that come up. What I want you to do is an exercise that I put in Happy Days, and it's called ‘Rage on the Page.’ And this could be anxiety on the page or fear on the page, or addiction on the page, whatever's coming up for you.

I want you to journal it. And so, every single day I want you to spend 20 minutes. You're abstinent from your social 20 minutes a day, journaling about all the anxiety, all the fear, all the chaos, all the drama, all the things that you don't face on a daily basis. And then I'd like you to meditate for 20 minutes following that.

And you'll have a lot of practices. You know, if you're in a miracle membership, there's hundreds of meditations, or this podcast has some meditations.

There's a meditation for connecting to self, which I really would think you could do after you do the journaling. And what I'm asking you to do is just start to become curious about the feelings that you're running from when you use social media.

So for one week, I want you to take the apps off your phone. And in that week, every single day, I want 20 minutes of journaling, followed by 20 minutes of meditation, and you can use episode 82, which is just a meditation, no ads, nothing, just a meditation.

You just join in and listen as a meditation on connecting to self, and that self energy is your higher power. It's the presence of love within you.

CALLER: Also there was a fake account created by somebody in my name, which makes me very anxious that if I am not present on the common social media platforms, something like that can again repeat in my life. And, there was a lot of bullsh*t which happened on that page.

So that is one more, you know, like a trigger factor.

GABBY: You know, Grammy, the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. That's the serenity prayer. I want to help you understand that most of us have fake accounts, right? And the good news is, is that the people who genuinely follow you, know it's not you.

They know it's not you, and it's a very common occurrence, and you can't control the internet, my love. You cannot control the internet. But taking a week off of your social media, if anything, it'll just stop people from making fake accounts, okay?

Because you're not giving them anything to fuel. So take that off the table. Don't worry about that. You can't control it anyway, whether you're there or not. No excuses. One week, take it away. Rage on the Page, or release on the page. It's in the chapter about the body, the somatic experiencing chapter in Happy Days, this whole practice of Rage on the Page. But it's really just getting your feelings out onto the page for 20 minutes and following that by 20 minute meditation. In this case, I'm suggesting this episode 82 followed by just some deep relaxation, and that episode is all about connecting to self.

So if you take away the drug of choice, which is social media, and you put this in place of it, you will begin a radical journey of releasing that addiction.

You got your homework?

CALLER: Yes. Sure. Sure. Gabby, thank you so much.

GABBY: I know it's scary, but I promise you one week you can do it.

CALLER: I'll do it. Definitely.

GABBY: Okay. Keep me posted, Samhita. Okay. You're awesome. Thank you.

CALLER: Thank you so much. Love you.

GABBY: Love you. So to close this show, I just wanna acknowledge that some of the big topics that we talked about here, were putting a spiritual practice in place of the desire to pick up whatever that drug of choice might be.

So you become abstinent. You no longer give yourself those permission given thoughts, and then when you notice the need or the desire to pick up the drink or to use the social media or to get the sugar, whatever it might be, you lean into a spiritual practice. And so, there's so many here on Dear Gabby.

You can go to episode 82 and do that Connecting to your Higher Self meditation. You can come back to this episode and listen to this again. You can do the eight Cs episode of the C Qualities of Self, which is episode 76.

You can give yourself the opportunity to pick up the phone and call a friend. When you put a spiritual practice in place of your addictive pattern, you begin to create a new pattern. You create a new neural pathway, you create a new habit, and all the while you're getting curious and getting to know the parts of you that need healing and tending to.

So let's put that self energy in the place of the addiction. Let's notice the addiction. Let's honor what's underneath it. Let's extend those qualities of self, the compassion, the courage, the connection, the calmness, the curiosity, the creativity, just getting connected to that part of who you are, and breathe with it with that beautiful episode 82 to where you could really just give yourself the permission to meditate and honor all of the feelings that are present for you.

The reason that we're addicted is because we're running from the feelings. But what if right here, right now, Gabby said to you, “You don't have to run.” You can befriend those feelings. You can care for those feelings. You can show up for those feelings, and when you show up for them, there's nothing left to run from.

Thank you for celebrating my 17 years of sobriety with me, and I promise my commitment to you and to myself and to my family is to stay clean one day at a time. Stay sober. Thank you for joining me, my friends. Thank you for joining me here today. I love you guys.

If you made it to the end of this episode, that means you're truly committed to miracles. I'm really proud of you. If you wanna get more Gabby, tune in every Monday for a new episode.

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Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.